Porsche Humiliates Tesla at the Nürburgring

Matthew Guy
by Matthew Guy

Zuffenhausen has knocked Tesla off its perch as king of the ‘ring, throwing down an all-electric lap time within a shout of the bonkers Rimac Nevera.

Sure, there’s plenty of valid argument that setting a lap time around what amounts to an arbitrary ribbon of tarmac in Germany – one with over 150 turns and stretching nearly 13 miles, no less – is a fool’s errand which proves little. Getting even one of those corners wrong can scupper a posted time and getting another go around isn’t exactly a simple task; this ain’t no 20 second lap at Martinsville.


Still, gearheads are a notably traditional lot, so we persist reporting on these things – especially when professional factory drivers reset notable records. This time around, Porsche development driver Lars Kern cracked off a lap time of 7:07.55 minutes on the Nordschleife, officially 26 seconds faster than the last Taycan effort in 2022 and over 17 seconds fleeter than the Tesla Model S Plaid's 7:25.23 time, the previous record in this vein.


Porsche is describing the car it used as a ‘pre-series Taycan’, suggesting the thing could be some sort of new high-performance trim set to debut when the model gets a midcycle refresh later this calendar year. This jives with the brand’s promise to release video footage of its 7:07.55 lap in mid-March. As for the car itself, a “legally prescribed” roll cage plus some racing bucket seats were installed but those are the only non-standard modifications described by Porsche. Smart money has this trim (called the GT? Maybe?) rocking a trio of electric motors with horsepower well into four-figure territory. Battery changes may also be in the offing to support longer bursts of balls-out driving. Let’s hope that’s the last time your author uses ‘burst’ and ‘balls’ in the same sentence.


We’ll keep our ears to the ground for news about the forthcoming Taycan refresh.


[Image: Porsche]


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Matthew Guy
Matthew Guy

Matthew buys, sells, fixes, & races cars. As a human index of auto & auction knowledge, he is fond of making money and offering loud opinions.

More by Matthew Guy

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  • Akear Akear on Jan 03, 2024

    Tesla sells nearly ten times as many EVs than Porsche. Does this even matter?

    • Jrhurren Jrhurren on Jan 03, 2024

      Sold, not sells. Future sales are what they are after.


  • Dr Mindbender Dr Mindbender on Jan 24, 2024

    Getting beaten by a Porsche is not humiliating. It's just the natural order of the universe. Elon has been trying to build an electric Porsche ever since he sold his 911.

  • Namesakeone If I were the parent of a teenage daughter, I would want her in an H1 Hummer. It would be big enough to protect her in a crash, too big for her to afford the fuel (and thus keep her home), big enough to intimidate her in a parallel-parking situation (and thus keep her home), and the transmission tunnel would prevent backseat sex.If I were the parent of a teenage son, I would want him to have, for his first wheeled transportation...a ride-on lawnmower. For obvious reasons.
  • ToolGuy If I were a teen under the tutelage of one of the B&B, I think it would make perfect sense to jump straight into one of those "forever cars"... see then I could drive it forever and not have to worry about ever replacing it. This plan seems flawless, doesn't it?
  • Rover Sig A short cab pickup truck, F150 or C/K-1500 or Ram, preferably a 6 cyl. These have no room for more than one or two passengers (USAA stats show biggest factor in teenage accidents is a vehicle full of kids) and no back seat (common sense tells you what back seats are used for). In a full-size pickup truck, the inevitable teenage accident is more survivable. Second choice would be an old full-size car, but these have all but disappeared from the used car lots. The "cute small car" is a death trap.
  • W Conrad Sure every technology has some environmental impact, but those stuck in fossil fuel land are just not seeing the future of EV's makes sense. Rather than making EV's even better, these automakers are sticking with what they know. It will mean their end.
  • Add Lightness A simple to fix, strong, 3 pedal car that has been tenderized on every corner.
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